So You Want to Talk About Race by Ijeoma Oluo

So You Want to Talk About Race by Ijeoma Oluo
Publisher: Seal Press
Publication Date: January 16, 2018
My rating: 5 of 5 stars

Publisher’s Description:

Widespread reporting on aspects of white supremacy — from police brutality to the mass incarceration of Black Americans — has put a media spotlight on racism in our society. Still, it is a difficult subject to talk about. How do you tell your roommate her jokes are racist? Why did your sister-in-law take umbrage when you asked to touch her hair — and how do you make it right? How do you explain white privilege to your white, privileged friend?

In So You Want to Talk About Race, Ijeoma Oluo guides readers of all races through subjects ranging from intersectionality and affirmative action to “model minorities” in an attempt to make the seemingly impossible possible: honest conversations about race and racism, and how they infect almost every aspect of American life.

Although So You Want to Talk About Race was first published in 2018, it made its way back to The New York Times bestseller list this summer after George Floyd’s murder. Every chapter in the book is a question – like what is Racism or Why Am I Always Being Told to Check My Privilege? or Is Police Brutality Really About Race and so much more. Oluo addresses multiple core issues related to race that most white people probably haven’t given much thought to or may not understand why race is an integral part of the problem – like the school to prison pipeline. Even if you consider yourself “woke”, I can almost guarantee, there will be something in this book that is new to you or is a new perspective on something you thought you already understood. I’ve studied a lot about race and racism over the years and my copy of this book still has tons of pages marked with post-its and highlighted.

I think the best part of this book is that Oluo explains things in accessible language that makes it easier to have conversations with people. For example, before I read this book, I knew that cultural appropriation is wrong but I didn’t have the language to articulate why simply and coherently. Or trying to explain to a white person why they can’t use the N-word, even if they are just quoting rap lyrics. These are just a couple of examples. This book is not just for white people to learn how to talk about race; she addresses people of color as well. Highly, highly recommended.

Side note: Oluo’s second book, Mediocre, was published a couple of weeks ago. I’m about half-way through reading it and it’s just as brilliant. Stay tuned for my review coming soon!

Book Review: The Rosie Result by Graeme Simsion

The Rosie Result by Graeme Simsion
Publisher: Text Publishing Company
Publication Date: May 28, 2019
My rating: 4 of 5 stars

*****The publisher’s description and my review have spoilers for The Rosie Project and The Rosie Effect the first two books in the Rosie series.*****

Publisher’s Description:

Don and Rosie are about to face their most important project.
Their son, Hudson, is having trouble at school: his teachers say he isn’t fitting in with the other kids, and they’d like Don and Rosie to think about getting an autism assessment. As his parents debate whether a diagnosis might help or hinder, Hudson has his own ideas. Meanwhile, Rosie is battling Judas at work, and Don is in hot water after the Genetics Lecture Outrage. The life-contentment graph, recently at its highest point, is curving downwards.

For Don Tillman, geneticist and World’s Best Problem-Solver, learning to be a good parent as well as a good partner will require the help of friends old and new. It will mean letting Hudson make his way in the world, and grappling with awkward truths about his own identity.
And opening a cocktail bar.

The Rosie Result is the final book in the Rosie trilogy. It fast-forwards eleven years from the end of The Rosie Effect. Don and Rosie are raising their son Hudson, who seems to have inherited Don’s quirks. His school is pressing Don and Rosie to have him tested for autism, but Don decides to take matters into his own hands first.

There is a lot going on in this final installment of the Rosie series. In addition to dealing with Hudson possibly having autism, both Don and Rosie are having trouble at their workplaces. Hudson has made friends with a girl at his school who has albinism and Don with her mother. That family has their share of problems as well. The theme of The Rosie Result is misunderstandings. It was a little stressful reading it, while everyone was trying to figure out what was really going on! But, it was also enjoyable because that’s where the humor came from.

While The Rosie Effect was a tad disappointing, The Rosie Result is on par with The Rosie Project. I feel like Don, Rosie and I are friends now and it’s been fun to watch them grow as people throughout the series.

My reviews for the first two books in the Rosie series:
The Rosie Project
The Rosie Effect

Book Review: The Rosie Effect by Graeme Simsion

The Rosie Effect by Graeme Simsion
Publisher: Simon & Schuster
Paperback Publication Date: July 21, 2015
My rating: 3.5 of 5 stars

*****The publisher’s description and my review have spoilers for The Rosie Project, the first book in the Rosie series.*****

Publisher’s Description:

Until recently, genetics professor Don Tillman had never had a second date. Then he got serious about finding a life partner, creating a sixteen-page questionnaire (see: The Rosie Project) to identify the perfect match. Instead, he fell in love with Rosie Jarman (“the world’s most incompatible woman”. Now they have survived ten months and ten days of marriage.

Though the fiery Rosie has taught him the joys of unscheduled sex and spontaneous meal planning, Don is still learning the principles of optimal cohabitation. He’s certainly not prepared for the mother of all surprises: Rosie is unexpectedly expecting.

Is Don ready to become the man he always dreamed of being? Or will he revert to his old ways and lose Rosie forever?

The Rosie Effect is the second book in the Rosie trilogy. You definitely need to read The Rosie Project first. In The Rosie Effect, Don and Rosie are married and have moved to New York City so that Rosie can go to medical school at Columbia. They are both surprised when Rosie finds out she’s pregnant. If you know Don, you can guess how well he deals with the unexpected.

The Rosie Effect was just as funny as The Rosie Project. The scene where Don gets arrested at a playground after he follows his friend Gene’s advice to “watch some kids” to figure out how they behave is particularly hilarious. However, I found the drama between Don and Rosie to be somewhat manufactured. I didn’t like Rosie much in this book and I liked her a lot in The Rosie Project. It didn’t feel like her character took an authentic turn in this book. That being said, I still enjoyed The Rosie Effect and I definitely recommend it if you read and liked The Rosie Project.

You can find my review of The Rosie Project here.

Book Review: The Rosie Project by Graeme Simsion

The Rosie Project by Graeme Simsion
Publisher: Simon & Schuster
Paperback Publication Date: June 3, 2014
My rating: 4.5 of 5 stars

Publisher’s Description:

The art of love is never a science: Meet Don Tillman, a brilliant yet socially inept professor of genetics, who’s decided it’s time he found a wife. In the orderly, evidence-based manner with which Don approaches all things, he designs the Wife Project to find his perfect partner: a sixteen-page, scientifically valid survey to filter out the drinkers, the smokers, the late arrivers.

Rosie Jarman possesses all these qualities. Don easily disqualifies her as a candidate for The Wife Project (even if she is “quite intelligent for a barmaid”). But Don is intrigued by Rosie’s own quest to identify her biological father. When an unlikely relationship develops as they collaborate on The Father Project, Don is forced to confront the spontaneous whirlwind that is Rosie―and the realization that, despite your best scientific efforts, you don’t find love, it finds you.

Don Tillman, a genetics professor who is most likely on the autism spectrum, (although it’s never explicitly stated) has decided it’s time to take a wife. What better way to find one than with a detailed questionnaire? It’s simple logic. Enter Rosie Jarman. She is clearly not wife material – she’s spontaneous, she’s late, she drinks alcohol and she smokes. However, Don agrees to help her find her biological father even though he would never marry her.

Don is a lot like Sheldon on The Big Bang Theory – he cannot see through sarcasm or irony. As such, his internal monologue can be quite hilarious. He maintains a rigid schedule. For instance, to reduce “cognitive load”, he has devised a Standardized Meal System. He rotates cooking seven dinners, one for every night of the week. Tuesdays are lobster nights. Any deviation from his routine makes him uncomfortable. When Rosie comes into his life, his routine goes off-kilter almost immediately.

In spite of Don’s quirks, he is a sweet man and I found him endearing. Rosie is baffled by him at first but they grow to somewhat understand each other. They are really funny together – I enjoyed the humor of The Rosie Project so much that I immediately read the next two books of the Rosie trilogy! Highly recommended.

Book Review: The Incendiaries by R.O. Kwon

The Incendiaries by R.O. Kwon
Publisher: Riverhead Books
Publication Date: July 31, 2018
My rating: 4 of 5 stars

Publisher’s Description:

Phoebe Lin and Will Kendall meet in their first month at prestigious Edwards University. Phoebe is a glamorous girl who doesn’t tell anyone she blames herself for her mother’s recent death. Will is a misfit scholarship boy who transfers to Edwards from Bible college, waiting tables to get by. What he knows for sure is that he loves Phoebe.

Grieving and guilt-ridden, Phoebe is drawn into a secretive cult founded by a charismatic former student with an enigmatic past. When the group commits a violent act in the name of faith, Will finds himself struggling to confront a new version of the fanaticism he’s worked so hard to escape. Haunting and intense, The Incendiaries is a fractured love story that explores what can befall those who lose what they love most.

The Incendiaries focuses on Will, a born-again Christian turned atheist and Phoebe, a lively party girl. They both harbor guilt about things in their past. Will helped convert his mother to a faith he no longer believes in and Phoebe blames herself for her mother’s death. When Phoebe is slowly drawn into a cult, Will tries his best to save her.

The Incendiaries was this month’s pick for my Moms group book club. We all agreed that the way the book started off is confusing. I got about 30 pages in and realized that I needed to start over. Once I reread the first 30 pages, I had a much better handle on what was going on. There are no quotation marks in the book, a device that I’m never fond of. Much of the book is Will speculating what Phoebe says in her confessions at cult meetings, making him an unreliable narrator at times.

Lack of quotation marks aside, I did enjoy this book. It explores loss in ways I hadn’t thought of previously. Not only is Phoebe mourning the loss of her mother, Will is mourning the loss of his religion. He’s sad that he doesn’t believe anymore. And I’m always intrigued by how a rational person can be drawn into and overtaken by a cult. Even though this is a slim novel at just over 200 pages, we found a lot to discuss in our book club meeting. Recommended.

Audiobook Review: Doing Justice: A Prosecutor’s Thoughts on Crime, Punishment, and the Rule of Law by Preet Bharara

Doing Justice: A Prosecutor’s Thoughts on Crime, Punishment, and the Rule of Law by Preet Bharara
Publisher: Knopf
Publication Date: March 19, 2019
My rating: 4 of 5 stars

By the one-time federal prosecutor for the Southern District of New York, an important overview of the way our justice system works, and why the rule of law is essential to our society. Using case histories, personal experiences and his own inviting writing and teaching style, Preet Bharara shows the thought process we need to best achieve truth and justice in our daily lives and within our society.

Preet Bharara has spent much of his life examining our legal system, pushing to make it better, and prosecuting those looking to subvert it. Bharara believes in our system and knows it must be protected, but to do so, we must also acknowledge and allow for flaws in the system and in human nature.

The book is divided into four sections: Inquiry, Accusation, Judgment and Punishment. He shows why each step of this process is crucial to the legal system, but he also shows how we all need to think about each stage of the process to achieve truth and justice in our daily lives.

Bharara uses anecdotes and case histories from his legal career–the successes as well as the failures–to illustrate the realities of the legal system, and the consequences of taking action (and in some cases, not taking action, which can be just as essential when trying to achieve a just result).

 Much of what Bharara discusses is inspiring–it gives us hope that rational and objective fact-based thinking, combined with compassion, can truly lead us on a path toward truth and justice. Some of what he writes about will be controversial and cause much discussion. Ultimately, it is a thought-provoking, entertaining book about the need to find the humanity in our legal system–and in our society.

Preet Bharara was the federal prosecutor for the Southern District of New York who was fired by Donald Trump in 2017. (That used to be a dubious distinction – now he is just one of legions of people Trump has dismissed.) However, this book isn’t focused on his firing. His book is a walk through each step of the legal process – inquiry, accusation, judgment and punishment – and how each step works in the context of the SDNY.

I found the examples he used in the book fascinating. A book of this nature could easily be dry and boring but Bharara’s style is engaging. I found the section on inquiry to be particularly interesting. It’s such a long, detailed process to develop a rapport with someone so that they will feel comfortable providing information. I had no idea.

I listened to the audiobook of Doing Justice. Bharara reads it himself in a conversational manner. He has a podcast about legal topics called Stay Tuned. I haven’t listened to it yet but I plan to soon. If it’s as good as his book, then I know I’ll enjoy it. If you already listen to his podcast, then check out his book. Recommended.

Happy Thanksgiving!

I hope everyone has a happy and safe Thanksgiving!

Book Review: The Boy on the Bridge by M.R. Carey

The Boy on the Bridge by M.R. Carey
Publisher: Orbit
Publication Date: May 2, 2017
My rating: 4 of 5 stars

Publisher’s Description:

One exceptional boy journeys into the ashes of society to find the cure for a devastating plague in this riveting post-apocalyptic standalone set in the same world as the USA Today-bestselling The Girl With All the Gifts.

Once upon a time, in a land blighted by terror, there was a very clever boy.

The people thought the boy could save them, so they opened their gates and sent him out into the world.

To where the monsters lived.

The Boy on the Bridge is a stand-alone novel set in the same world as The Girl with All the Gifts but it’s also a prequel of sorts. If you haven’t read either, I would start with The Girl with All the Gifts. The Boy on the Bridge has a couple of spoilers in it if it’s read first. Accordingly, this review will be short as I don’t want to spoil The Girl with All the Gifts. Check out my review of The Girl with All the Gifts here.

The Boy on the Bridge takes place probably ten or fifteen years before The Girl with All the Gifts. The apocalypse due to the plague has already happened and a team comprised of military personal and scientists is traveling about England, trying to determine the cause and if there is a cure.

The first half of this book was very slow and not much happened. If you can make it through, it picks up quite a bit in the second half. I didn’t like it quite as much as The Girl with All the Gifts but I still enjoyed it and would recommend it to readers who liked The Girl with All the Gifts.

(I received a complimentary copy of this book for review.)

Book Review: Eleven Rings: The Soul of Success by Phil Jackson

Eleven Rings: The Soul of Success by Phil Jackson
Publisher: Penguin Press
Publication Date: May 21, 2013
My rating: 4 of 5 stars

Publisher’s Description:

During his storied career as head coach of the Chicago Bulls and Los Angeles Lakers, Phil Jackson won more championships than any coach in the history of professional sports. Even more important, he succeeded in never wavering from coaching his way, from a place of deep values. Jackson was tagged as the “Zen master” half in jest by sportswriters, but the nickname speaks to an important truth: this is a coach who inspired, not goaded; who led by awakening and challenging the better angels of his players’ nature, not their egos, fear, or greed.

This is the story of a preacher’s kid from North Dakota who grew up to be one of the most innovative leaders of our time. In his quest to reinvent himself, Jackson explored everything from humanistic psychology and Native American philosophy to Zen meditation. In the process, he developed a new approach to leadership based on freedom, authenticity, and selfless teamwork that turned the hypercompetitive world of professional sports on its head.

In Eleven Rings, Jackson candidly describes how he:

   •  Learned the secrets of mindfulness and team chemistry while playing for the champion New York Knicks in the 1970s
   •  Managed Michael Jordan, the greatest player in the world, and got him to embrace selflessness, even if it meant losing a scoring title
   •  Forged successful teams out of players of varying abilities by getting them to trust one another and perform in sync
   •  Inspired Dennis Rodman and other “uncoachable” personalities to devote themselves to something larger than themselves
   •  Transformed Kobe Bryant from a rebellious teenager into a mature leader of a championship team.

Eleven times, Jackson led his teams to the ultimate goal: the NBA championship—six times with the Chicago Bulls and five times with the Los Angeles Lakers. We all know the legendary stars on those teams, or think we do. What Eleven Rings shows us, however, is that when it comes to the most important lessons, we don’t know very much at all. This book is full of revelations: about fascinating personalities and their drive to win; about the wellsprings of motivation and competition at the highest levels; and about what it takes to bring out the best in ourselves and others.

As coach of the Chicago Bulls and then the Los Angeles Lakers, Phil Jackson won a total of eleven NBA championships. Eleven Rings is both a memoir and a self-help/management book. However, Phil doesn’t go into much detail on his personal life. He mostly mentions it when it directly relates to what was going on with his basketball life at the time. The main focus of the book is his coaching philosophy and what has influenced it. Phil is a student of many teachers. He reads a lot and seems especially drawn to Native American and Buddhist philosophy.

I actually got this book when it first came out because I was a huge Chicago Bulls fan back in the Michael Jordan days. Like most of the books I acquire, it promptly went into my TBR pile. I dug it out after watching the docuseries about Michael Jordan’s last season with the Bulls, The Last Dance, on Netflix. I wanted to know more about Phil Jackson and his coaching because it was clear from the documentary that his players loved him.

I enjoyed learning more about Phil’s unorthodox style, from the infamous triangle defense, to teaching his players to meditate. Every season, he gave each player a book that he had chosen especially for them that he thought would speak to them in some way or have something to teach them. It could be anything – non-fiction, a novel or poetry. How cool is that? They didn’t always read them but at least he tried.

He doesn’t go into detail about his players’ personal lives but he is quite candid about challenges he had coaching various players. Of course he struggled with Dennis Rodman, but he also had trouble with others, including quite a bit with Kobe Bryant, who was still a teenager when he started with the Lakers. I was impressed by how he handled each player differently according to the guidance they needed. He didn’t subscribe to a one-size-fits-all approach in anything he did. That’s not to say that he was a perfect coach. He messed up sometimes and he admits his mistakes in this book.

You don’t need to be a hard-core basketball fan to enjoy Eleven Rings. There are technical details about basketball of course, but I feel like a lot of the coaching skills he uses can be applied in everyday life as well. Recommended.

Book Review: The House of Broken Angels by Luis Alberto Urrea

The House of Broken Angels by Luis Alberto Urrea
Publisher: John Murray
Publication Date: August 8, 2019
My rating: 4 of 5 stars

Publisher’s Description:

“All we do, mija, is love. Love is the answer. Nothing stops it. Not borders. Not death.”

In his final days, beloved and ailing patriarch Miguel Angel de La Cruz, affectionately called Big Angel, has summoned his entire clan for one last legendary birthday party. But as the party approaches, his mother, nearly one hundred, dies, transforming the weekend into a farewell doubleheader. Among the guests is Big Angel’s half brother, known as Little Angel, who must reckon with the truth that although he shares a father with his siblings, he has not, as a half gringo, shared a life.

Across two bittersweet days in their San Diego neighborhood, the revelers mingle among the palm trees and cacti, celebrating the lives of Big Angel and his mother, and recounting the many inspiring tales that have passed into family lore, the acts both ordinary and heroic that brought these citizens to a fraught and sublime country and allowed them to flourish in the land they have come to call home.

Teeming with brilliance and humor, authentic at every turn, The House of Broken Angels is Luis Alberto Urrea at his best, and cements his reputation as a storyteller of the first rank.

Miguel Angel de La Cruz, or Big Angel, as he’s known, calls his whole family back to celebrate what will be his last birthday – he’s been diagnosed with terminal cancer. His almost 100-year-old mother happens to die that weekend so the gathering morphs into a combination funeral and birthday party. It sounds like the makings of a somber occasion but it’s not. The de La Cruz family is a lively cast of characters, full of spirit and humor. (I had trouble keeping track of everyone. Some editions of the book have a family tree in them – if you decide to read this book, I recommend trying to find a copy that includes one.)

Little Angel, Big Angel’s half-brother, comes to visit for the celebration. He’s been raised by his white mother. He’s struggling with his identity as both white and Mexican and feeling somewhat like an outsider in the de La Cruz family, even though he is a part of it. Throughout the weekend, he listens as Big Angel tells him stories about his life and as people come to pay tribute to both Big Angel and Big Angel’s mother.

At its heart, The House of Broken Angels is about family. Urrea gave the relationships and characters wonderful depth. He based the novel on his relationship with his older half-brother, who also had a huge final birthday party. I’m sure that’s why the family in this book seems so authentic and their love for one another so real.