The Long Drive Home

Here is a list of questions the boys asked me on the 25 minute drive home from church:

From Cash:
How do school days pass?
How do days turn into seasons?
How do flowers die?
Do roses fold up?

From West:
Why do cars crash?
How does Saturn get cold?

Of course, these questions were just starting points and led to many follow-up questions when I attempted to answer them in a manner that a four-year-old and two-year-old could understand. At one point, Cash was literally sobbing because he couldn't understand my attempts to answer the first question. How the heck do you explain how days pass? I know today was passing VERY SLOWLY until I came up with an explanation he found satisfactory. (Days pass when the sun goes down and then comes back up.) I am not smart enough to have these kids.

Book Review: Life With My Sister Madonna

Life with My Sister Madonna by Christopher Ciccone

rating: 2 of 5 stars
God, Christopher Ciccone is whiny. And catty. There is really no new information about Madonna in this book, it’s just Christopher whining about how she’s mistreated him all these years. Basically, every time he works for her, she rips him off (doesn’t pay him fairly, replaces him at the last minute, etc.) You know what – then quit working for her! Christopher can’t do that though because he has no formal training to do ANYTHING. Madonna lets him dance in her videos, design her houses, dress her for her tours, art direct her tours and gets her friends to give him gallery shows, even though he’s never formally trained do any of that (except dance). And all he does is bitch about how horrible it is to work for her. I’m not a huge Madonna fan; I just read this book because I like reading about the entertainment business and stars in general. But there was nothing new here – almost nothing about Madonna’s childhood, no insights into her personality. I really don’t think Madonna and Christopher were ever that close, even though they spent a lot of time together, because he relates virtually nothing about Madonna’s personal life. Or else he was never paying attention what was going on in it because he’s just as self-absorbed as she is.

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Short Take

The weather is really nice today so West wore his windbreaker this morning. Which he calls his "breaking wind jacket".

Breakfast With A Giraffe

When Cash started toting his lizard everywhere and dressing him up, West decided that he needed a pet too. West has a different pet almost every day but one of his favorites is his giraffe – or buh-jaff, as he calls it.


Like West, the big buh-jaff is not potty-trained yet. Ironically, West's small buh-jaff is potty-trained. Here are the two buh-jaff's eating their breakfast.

You Are What You Eat

West and I have some version of this conversation several times a day:

"West, do you need a kleenex? West, don't eat that booger. Here's a kleenex, West. West, DO.NOT.PUT.THAT.BOOGER.IN.YOUR.MOUTH."

"I ate it Mommy. I'm a booger-eater."

He's going to be the class booger-eater when he goes to kindergarten. And get his ass kicked.

The Power of Positivity

You Say It’s Your Birthday

Thursday while driving home from a doctor's appointment Cash exclaimed, "Mommy, did you forget that today is the lizard's birthday?" Um, did I even know that today was the lizard's birthday? Cash wanted to make a cake for him as soon as we got home. I told him that we didn't have time to bake a cake right then but he assured me that it would be easy. "All we need is cheese and coconut and then cook it for 15 minutes," he explained. Wow, that does sound easy. But we didn't have time even for that.

Yesterday Cash and I had some one-on-one time while West was spending the day at Grandma's house so Cash decided it would be a great time to have the lizard's birthday party. First, we went to the grocery store to get the ingredients for the cake. On the way home Cash told me, "Mommy, I have to make the all the decorations and the presents so you're going to have to make the cake by yourself." When I told him that it wouldn't be very much fun for me to make the cake by myself, he cheered, "I know you can do it Mommy!" Thanks for the pep talk kid. So I made the cake while Cash worked on the decorations and presents. Then he helped me decorate it.

I asked him what he wanted me to write on it and he said "Mommy". I asked him if he thought maybe I should write "Lizard" instead since it was the lizard's birthday and he said no, I could just write "H".
 
The lizard was turning five so he had five candles to blow out.
 
He loved the cake – chocolate is his favorite.
 
The pink streamers Cash made are on the wall next to the window. As I was taking pictures of the birthday party, I told Cash and the lizard to smile. Cash said, "He can't smile Mommy; he's just a toy." If you know he's a toy, then why did we have this birthday party? I think I just got conned into making a cake. Smart boy.

He’s A Maniac, Maniac On The Floor

And he's dancing like he's never danced before…

Did you know that West was an aerobics instructor in 1985?

(Thanks for the picture Capello!)

Warm and Toasty

It's freakin' cold here right now – temperatures are below zero with the wind chill. It's the perfect day to wear warm and toasty hand knit socks. My friend Jessica knit these socks and gave them to me for Christmas last year. They're so pretty; it's a shame they have to be covered up with shoes and pants most of the time.


The light is better in this picture:

Like Father, Like Son

Here's Cash with a truck and driver he drew and cut out all by himself. He's becoming quite the little artist. He'd rather sit and color than do almost anything else.