Book Review: “Why Are All the Black Kids Sitting Together in the Cafeteria?”

“Why Are All The Black Kids Sitting Together in the Cafeteria?”: A Psychologist Explains the Development of Racial Identity by Beverly Daniel Tatum

My rating: 5 of 5 stars

Publisher’s Description:

Walk into any racially mixed high school and you will see black youth seated together in the cafeteria. Of course, it’s not just the black kids sitting together-the white, Latino, Asian Pacific, and, in some regions, American Indian youth are clustered in their own groups, too. The same phenomenon can be observed in college dining halls, faculty lounges, and corporate cafeterias. What is going on here? Is this self-segregation a problem we should try to fix, or a coping strategy we should support? How can we get past our reluctance to talk about racial issues to even discuss it? And what about all the other questions we and our children have about race? Beverly Daniel Tatum, a renowned authority on the psychology of racism, asserts that we do not know how to talk about our racial differences: Whites are afraid of using the wrong words and being perceived as “racist” while parents of color are afraid of exposing their children to painful racial realities too soon. Using real-life examples and the latest research, Tatum presents strong evidence that straight talk about our racial identities-whatever they may be-is essential if we are serious about facilitating communication across racial and ethnic divides. We have waited far too long to begin our conversations about race. This remarkable book, infused with great wisdom and humanity, has already helped hundreds of thousands of readers figure out where to start.

This is an excellent book on racism and racial identity. It’s very readable and would a great first book for someone just learning about the concepts of white privilege and institutional racism.

The author walks the reader through the development of one’s racial identity (both black and white) from pre-school through adulthood, with every point backed up with research. I think her section on “white identity” will be truly eye-opening to a lot of white people who read it. I’ve taken quite a few workshops related to white privilege and racism and the author did a nice job of compiling everything I’ve learned all into one book. She writes objectively, without anger and without trying to make the white reader feel guilty about being white.

Although most of the book deals with black people and white people, there is a chapter that deals with other people of color. However, this book was written pre-9/11 – I think the section on people of Middle Eastern descent would have been different and perhaps longer if she had written it post-9/11.

I wish I could make this book required reading for just about everyone. I originally bought it because I thought it would help me in raising my daughter (who is African American) but actually this book has valuable information that I can use with ALL of my kids to help them grow up to be conscientious citizens of the world.

Buy this book at:
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Book Review: Skipping a Beat

Skipping a Beat by Sarah Pekkanen

My rating: 3 of 5 stars

Publisher’s Description:

From the outside, Julia and Michael seem to have it all.  Both products of difficult childhoods in rural West Virginia – where they were simply Julie and Mike – they become high school sweethearts and fall in love.  Shortly after graduation, they flee their small town to start afresh.  Now thirty-somethings, they are living a rarefied life in their multi-million-dollar, Washington D.C. home. Julia is a highly sought-after party planner, while Michael has just sold his wildly successful flavored water company for $70 million.

But one day, Michael collapses in his office. Four minutes and eight seconds after his cardiac arrest, a portable defibrillator jump-starts his heart. But in those lost minutes he becomes a different man. Money is meaningless to him – and he wants to give it all away. Julia, who sees bits of her life reflected in scenes from the world’s great operas, is now facing with a choice she never anticipated. Should she should walk away from the man she once adored – but who truthfully became a stranger to her long before this pronouncement – or give in to her husband’s pleas for a second chance and a promise of a poorer but happier life?

The premise of this book intrigued me. Would it be that easy to give up so much material wealth for a marriage that wasn’t that great in the first place? The author did a good job of setting up Julia’s back-story so that we understand why financial security is even more important to her than most people. However, I still had a hard time feeling sorry for her because I found her to be so selfish. Her relationship with Michael baffled me; their marriage seemed to deteriorate so quickly after Michael’s company took off and their lack of communication after that was astounding. If I were Julia, there were some things that I could not have kept my mouth shut about. I really liked Julia’s friend Isabelle. I would love to see a spin-off book with her as the main character.

I chose this book for my book club’s June read based on the great reviews it got around the blogosphere when it was first published. After reading it, I feel like my book club friends and I may be cold-hearted snakes because none of us liked it that much. That said, we still had a good, long conversation – mostly about the issues surrounding marriage that the book brings up.

I felt lukewarm about this book – I never cared enough about the characters, especially Julia, that I felt like crying over them. A lot of other reviewers were crying buckets at the end so maybe that says more about me than this book! I did enjoy parts of this book and clearly a lot of other people out there have enjoyed it wholeheartedly so you may want to check out some other reviews besides mine.

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Announcing Polygamy Week! July 1-7

Remember a while back when I was on a kick reading about polygamy? Well, I actually read enough books about it that I can post a whole week of polygamy book reviews. So I’ve decided to declare July 1-7 Polygamy Week on my blog. I’ll be reviewing Escape and Triumph by Carolyn Jessop, Under the Banner of Heaven by John Krakauer, and The 19th Wife by David Ebershoff. I may throw in a surprise bonus review as well! Each day will have an opportunity for you to link up with my post. You can start reading now and link up a new review or link up any reviews from your archives that have something to do with polygamy. I’m still very intrigued by this subject and am looking forward to seeing what books you all have read about it. Feel free to grab the button to use on your blog too!

Book Review: Nikki and Deja: Wedding Drama

Nikki and Deja: Wedding Drama by Karen English

My rating: 3.5 of 5 stars

Publisher’s Description:

Ms. Shelby is getting married! As the girls in Nikki and Deja’s class compete over who can plan the best imaginary wedding for their teacher, Nikki excitedly throws herself into preparations for the real thing. But Deja is not so enthusiastic. Her Auntie Dee has been temporarily laid off from her job, and Deja is worried. What will happen now that she can no longer afford a new dress and special hairdo? Will Nikki leave her best friend behind while she shops and primps? Will Deja be able to get over her jealousy and enjoy the celebration anyway?

This is the fifth book in the Nikki and Deja series but it could easily stand alone. I haven’t read any of the previous books and I didn’t feel like I missed anything. The intended audience for this book is ages 6 to 9 or grades 1 to 4. This was definitely a feminine story, all about the excitement of planning a wedding. As much as I hate to classify things by gender, I don’t think this book will appeal to most boys (nor is it meant to.) This book did a good job of capturing how competitive and snotty little girls can be with each other and showing how it makes the girls on the receiving end of the snottiness feel bad.

I chose this book because it sounded like a cute story and there are girls of color on the cover. I think I’ve mentioned before, I like to acquire books for our home library that feature children of different colors and ethnicities, especially since as a foster parent I often have children of color living in my home and it makes them feel more comfortable here to have books that feature kids that look like them. I liked that even though this book had several characters that were people of color, race was not the focus of this book. Not every book with characters of color needs to be about racial issues – people of color do live ordinary lives just like white people.

I did think that the moral may have been a little too subtle for a little kid to grasp. This would be a good book to read with your child and discuss afterwards to make sure that she gets the intended message. Overall, this was a cute little story about friendship.

Buy this book at:
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(I received this book courtesy of the Amazon Vine program.)

Book Review and Author Event: Gone Girl by Gillian Flynn

Gone Girl by Gillian Flynn

My rating: 5 of 5 stars

Publisher’s Description:

On a warm summer morning in North Carthage, Missouri, it is Nick and Amy Dunne’s fifth wedding anniversary. Presents are being wrapped and reservations are being made when Nick’s clever and beautiful wife disappears from their rented McMansion on the Mississippi River. Husband-of-the-Year Nick isn’t doing himself any favors with cringe-worthy daydreams about the slope and shape of his wife’s head, but passages from Amy’s diary reveal the alpha-girl perfectionist could have put anyone dangerously on edge. Under mounting pressure from the police and the media—as well as Amy’s fiercely doting parents—the town golden boy parades an endless series of lies, deceits, and inappropriate behavior. Nick is oddly evasive, and he’s definitely bitter—but is he really a killer?

As the cops close in, every couple in town is soon wondering how well they know the one that they love. With his twin sister, Margo, at his side, Nick stands by his innocence. Trouble is, if Nick didn’t do it, where is that beautiful wife? And what was in that silvery gift box hidden in the back of her bedroom closet?

Oh my gosh – this book was so good. I was drawn in right from the title which is perfect for this book. “Gone Girl” just sounds creepy and intriguing. This is one of those books that is really hard to review without spoiling it but I shall try. Gillian Flynn has created two fabulous characters in Nick and Amy. While the plot of this book is primarily the mystery of what happened to Amy, it’s also a study of Nick and Amy’s marriage and how things change once they both lose their jobs and move from New York City to Missouri. I had the pleasure of seeing Gillian speak at an event hosted by Rainy Day Books. She said Gone Girl is about how no one really knows what goes on in a marriage and what happens when your golden lifestyle that you define yourself by is stripped away.

Other highlights of Gillian’s talk:

+ When asked to comment about the fact that her two previous novels have angry female main characters, Gillian stated that women are not innately good as it is sometimes assumed and that they should get credit for trying to be good. Rage and anger are normal emotions for both men and women but some reason we tend to think there is something wrong with a woman who is feeling angry. I haven’t read Gillian’s previous two books but I thought she made a really good point – women should be allowed to be angry.

+ Gillian said that she could probably set up a perfect murder in real life, but she would crack under the pressure of being questioned. She also said that she doesn’t have the twists and turns her stories take in mind when she writes; she just sees where the story goes as she’s writing it. I can’t imagine!

+ One of the characters in Gone Girl makes fun of the Mid-West and the people who live there and at first I was a little offended. Then I found out that Gillian is originally from the Kansas City area and that made it okay with me. You have the right to make fun of it if you grew up here. My favorite line from the book about the Mid-West is, “I have learned about bulk shopping in my four weeks as a Mississippi River resident. Republicans go to Sam’s Club, Democrats go to Costco.” That’s pretty much true in my neck of the woods! Gillian commented that there is a strange reverse eroticism that people on the coasts have about the Mid-West. You can tell them anything about the Mid-West and they’ll believe it.

+ The movie rights have been optioned for both her previous books – Sharp Objects and Dark Places. Gillian said that Sharp Objects is being developed by the producer of Paranormal Activity and that Amy Adams is attached to play Libby in Dark Places.

Me, Gillian and NerdyApple. Gillian told me that I had a friendly face and because of that she kept looking at me during her talk (I sat in the third row). She signed my book, “To Rachel – the great audience member – thank you!” That made me love her even more. I can’t wait to read her first two novels.

Bottom line: You must, must, must read Gone Girl – it’s gripping, surprising and twisted. What more could you want?

Buy this book at:
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Page to Screen: In Her Shoes

Yesterday, I reviewed the book In Her Shoes. Today I’m going to review the 2005 movie based on the book. This review assumes that you have read the book and may have spoilers for the book/movie if you haven’t.

I thought the screenwriter did a good job of adapting the book for the screen. The book is really long and a lot had to be trimmed and condensed to make the movie, which still ended up being two hours and eleven minutes long. I thought the choice to leave out Maggie going to Princeton was a good one – I found that part of the book to be unrealistic anyway.

I agreed with most of the casting choices. The main casting choice I didn’t like was Cameron Diaz as Maggie. The scenes where she is trying to read a book to a man in the nursing home she works in are awful. I didn’t find her believable as someone who has a learning disability. Actually, I don’t think she’s that great of an actress in general.  I know that some people thought Toni Collette was too thin to play Rose, but I wouldn’t have expected them to cast a plump actress. Unfortunately that’s just not how Hollywood movies work. Shirley MacLaine was wonderful of course – she was nominated for a Golden Globe for Best Supporting Actress for her role as Ella Hirsch.

Incidentally, when Jennifer Weiner spoke at the BEA Bloggers convention, she mentioned that she was really happy with how the movie had turned out. She strikes me as someone who would let the world know if she wasn’t happy with it so I think she was telling the truth. It’s always nice to hear that an author is satisfied with the screen adaptation of their book – it must be hard to let go of control over your characters and story.

If you liked the book In Her Shoes then I think you will enjoy the movie as well. I think fans of romantic comedies will enjoy this movie even if they haven’t read the book.

Buy or rent this movie at:
Amazon Instant Video

Book Review: In Her Shoes

In Her Shoes by Jennifer Weiner

My rating: 3 of 5 stars

Publisher’s Description:

Meet Rose Feller, a thirty-year-old high-powered attorney with a secret passion for romance novels. She has an exercise regime she’s going to start next week, and she dreams of a man who will slide off her glasses, gaze into her eyes, and tell her she’s beautiful. She also dreams of getting her fantastically screwed-up, semi-employed little sister to straighten up and fly right.

Meet Rose’s sister, Maggie. Twenty-eight years old and drop-dead gorgeous. Although her big-screen stardom hasn’t progressed past her left hip’s appearance in a Will Smith video, Maggie dreams of fame and fortune — and of getting her big sister on a skin-care regimen.

These two women, who claim to have nothing in common but a childhood tragedy, DNA, and the same size feet, are about to learn that they’re more alike than they’d ever imagined. Along the way, they’ll encounter a diverse cast of characters — from a stepmother who’s into recreational Botox to a disdainful pug with no name. They’ll borrow shoes and clothes and boyfriends, and eventually make peace with their most intimate enemies — each other.

From the very beginning of this book, I had a hard time liking Maggie. The way she treats Rose is just awful. Because of that I had a hard time understanding why Rose was so forgiving and patient with her. Maybe I don’t understand that kind of sisterly relationship because I don’t have a sister myself. Or maybe I’m just cold-hearted! I also thought both characters could have been developed a little more. They both change a lot over the course of the book but I didn’t feel like the impetus for the change in either of them was explored enough.

I especially liked the scenes that took place at the retirement home. I thought Mrs. Lefkowitz, a blunt and spunky eighty-something year old retiree, was really funny. Overall, I found In Her Shoes to be an enjoyable feel-good novel.

I listened to the audio book version of In Her Shoes which is narrated by Barbara McCulloh. I thought she did a great job with the narration. She had an upbeat, almost sassy style of reading that fit perfectly with the tone of the book. This book is a good choice for listening to in the car.

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Book Review: Let’s Pretend This Never Happened

Let’s Pretend This Never Happened: A Mostly True Memoir by Jenny Lawson

My rating: 5 of 5 stars

Jenny Lawson, also known as The Bloggess, has compiled several stories from throughout her life into a hilarious memoir. If you read her blog, then you already know that she has a unique perspective on the world and that is what makes her telling a story a million times funnier than if a “regular” person had told that story. She’s incredibly honest and not afraid to show her vulnerabilities. She writes openly about her struggles with depression and anxiety disorder and even manages to make those stories hilarious too.

I don’t think you need to be a reader of The Bloggess to enjoy this book thoroughly. I had only become aware of Jenny’s blog a couple of months before reading this book (I know, where have I been??) and I still loved it and loved her by the time I finished it. It’s one of the few books where I truly laughed uncontrollably out loud while reading, to the point of tears. One night when I was reading in bed, my husband moved to the couch to sleep because I could not keep myself quiet! I also embarrassed myself on an airplane while reading this book.

I had the pleasure of hearing Jenny speak at the BEA Bloggers conference and she was just as funny in person. And so charming; it’s easy to see why her blog has such a big following. But even if you don’t follow her blog, you should read this book, especially when you need a good, deep belly laugh.

Buy this book at:
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(I received this book courtesy of the publisher.)

Third and Final (for me) Day at BEA

My third and last day at BEA started off with the Children’s Book and Author Breakfast which was hosted by Chris Colfer, otherwise known as Kurt from Glee. The other authors who spoke were John Green, Lois Lowry and Kadir Nelson. My primary reason for attending the breakfast to hear Chris Colfer speak so I’m going to focus on his remarks. He has a children’s book coming out in July called The Land of Stories: The Wishing Well.

Chris spoke about how he has been writing and illustrating this book since he was ten years old. He even showed slides of drawings he had done for the book in elementary school and then the same drawing as redone and interpreted by the book’s illustrator, Brandon Dorman. I thought it was really neat that this was not just a book Chris had written to capitalize on his celebrity status but a real life long dream of his fulfilled.

After breakfast, it was another long day of trolling booths and meeting with authors and publicists. I had my picture taken with Tim Gunn for my mother’s sake – she loves him a lot.

I had David Thorne sign his new book, I’ll Go Home Then, It’s Warm and Has Chairs. The Unpublished Emails. for my husband. I told him that my husband is also a graphic designer so he really enjoys David’s emails about people wanting free graphic design work and of course the Missing Missy poster. (I still cry with laughter every time I read it.) David said that a lot of designers liked his first book; he did not seem taken by my gushing. His inscription reads, “To Travis, Sorry about writing in your book. David Thorne.” He’s crotchety but I love him anyway.

I also got signed copies of Naomi Wolf’s new book Vagina, which comes out in September (and just mentioning it here is going to get me all kinds of nasty spam. You should have seen all the disgusting spam comments I got when I reviewed Winter’s Bone) and Jonathon Tropper’s new book One Last Thing Before I Go, which comes out in August. And lots of other good stuff too – I need to hole up in a cave for a week by myself and just read, read, read.

BEA Day 2 Report

The second day of BEA started with the Adult Book & Author Breakfast. Stephen Colbert hosted it and was hilarious of course. My favorite quote from him was that BEA was “the lollapalooza of reading quietly to yourself.” The authors who spoke at that breakfast were Junot Diaz, Barbara Kingsolver and Jo Nesbo. I enjoyed all of their talks, especially Jo Nesbo’s. He was really funny which I didn’t expect. Neither did Stephen Colbert – check out this video of Colbert being interviewed after hosting the breakfast: Colbert Interview

After the breakfast, I hit the show floor to scope out the exhibitor booths. Luckily BEA had a handy mobile app, BEA Mobile, that included a map of the convention floor and lists of all the exhibitors and author signings. The best thing about it was that I could add just the events I was interested in to the My Agenda function and just refer to it to know when I needed to be somewhere. I didn’t get to meet all of the authors I wanted to because some of them had ridiculously long lines. There are very few authors that I’ll wait in line for an hour or more to meet!

I was thrilled to meet Shannon Hale. She was autographing copies of her new book Princess Academy: Palace of Stone. It’s the sequel to the Newbery Honoree Princess Academy and will be released on August 21. I haven’t read Princess Academy – the main reason I wanted to meet Shannon was to gush to her about how much I loved The Actor and the Housewife. She said she loved that book too and that it was really hard to let go of Felix and Becky once the book was finished. I told her I felt the same way; I felt like they were my friends and I was sad to leave them when the book was over. I asked her if anyone had approached her about making a movie out of it and she said no. Someone needs to because that book would make an awesome movie! After our little chat, she signed my book, “To Rachel, who would be friends with Felix. Shannon Hale.” Now I love her even more.

One book I picked up that I’m excited about reading is The Diary of B.B. Bright Possible Princess by Alice Randall and Caroline Randall Williams. It caught my eye because of the black girl on the cover. Now that I have an African American daughter, I’m more tuned into how unfortunately rare it is for a person of color to be on a book cover and I’m always happy when I do see a cover that has a person of color on it.

The blurb on the back sounds intriguing: Thirteen-year-old orphan Black Bee Bright (B. B. for short) is funny, quirky, precocious, and adventurous. But B. B. has a secret. She’s captive on an island in “the middle of very tropical nowhere” because she’s forced to hide her true identity as a royally born princess from her parents’ enemies in Raven World. B. B and cool clothes, but she can’t escape the island until she passes her Official Princess Test and undertakes a dangerous journey alone to the East side of the island, where eight princesses must help her discover what it truly means to be a princess.

I chatted with the lady from Turner Publishing working in the booth about how much I like the cover and so forth and she gave me a copy of the book even though it wasn’t a title they had brought to give away. I thought that was really nice of her. It’s due for release in September 2012.

I picked up many other books – so many that I had to drop off a load at the Fed Ex kiosk before noon! And I thought I was being pretty selective about the galleys I chose. Hopefully I can get many of them read and reviewed soon – I hope they are all as good as they look!